You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
