"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize
