I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize
