Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
