YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize