She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Randomize
