It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
