I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
My vagina is officially offended.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
