This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
