I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
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