so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
I think people are normalizing furries
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Randomize