are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
what the fuck happened to the tacos
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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