Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
