Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
i will never coherently bang her
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Randomize
