I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
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