My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize