you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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