This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
