69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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