He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Randomize
