try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize