Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize
