Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
