I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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