She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
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