haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize