I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
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