I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
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