her vagine was all disorganized.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
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