Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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