There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
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