were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
