it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
