I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
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