you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in