So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize