I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize