this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
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