Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
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