If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
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