my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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