we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
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