he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
Someone shattered a urinal.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize