I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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