like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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