singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize
