I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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