Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
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