she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Randomize
