Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Pooping to opera.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize