her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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