There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
